Friday, December 10, 2010

Imagine That

Today was what I like to call a very successful day. Not only did I get all my Christmas shopping done, I also managed to get some quality time in with an old friend of mine as well. Now that I'm sitting at home though, my poor knee is not exactly as excited as I am about all the running around that has happened today... In fact, that whole situation is kind of a funny story. In retrospect, of course.

.............It all went something like this............

The day after Thanksgiving, I had to be at my work at the crack of dawn. That means that my alarm clock kindly woke me up a little before 4am. I hate Black Friday. I don't see how people can justify saving 20 dollars and risk the chance of having their eye poked out by some soccer mom in aisle 6 of Target.

Sorry, I digress. After my 9 hour shift at work, I went straight to Kate's house so that we could attend The University of Tulsa's last home football game of the season together. Kate's dad works for the athletic department and he got me a pass to watch the game form the sidelines. Everything was going just dandy until Kate and I decided to get some hot chocolate and some snacks and head up to the athletic offices to watch the game and get out of the blustery, cold weather. We got our nachos and steaming hot chocolates and then the shit hit the fan. I fell. I fell walking up the stairs. I face planted. I wanted to die.

After a few people anxiously asked me if I was okay (whilst I did my best to hide my face) I noticed that my head and clothes were literally drenched in nacho cheese, and scalding hot chocolate. I actually had cheese dripping from my hair. I obviously had to do the walk of shame back to Kate's to shower and wash my clothes. Just to boot, I totally cut up my knee and left a decent baseball sized bruise on it. Ever since, my knee hasn't been the same at all.

Now, I thought that was pretty humiliating, but today my friend Rachel showed me that there are always people in this world who are willing to prove themselves as bigger dumbasses than myself. Anyways, whilst driving around town Rachel nonchalantly informed me that she pulled a muscle in her arm while playing guitar. She then went on to add that she was in front of a large group of people. But really, all in all, that was the extent of her explanations. I had just begun to mull over the unfortunate nature of this injury when something occurred to me. Rachel doesn't even play the guitar. When I asked her about this she stated, like it was no big deal that she "pulled it playing an imaginary guitar." SHE PULLED HER MUSCLE PLAYING AIR GUITAR, and the fact that she was so willing to share the nature of this asinine injury was just icing on the cake. I cannot even. You win, okay Rachel? You win...

Let's just say that I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

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